Nine Noble Virtues- Self Reliance

One of my earliest blog posts was about the Nine Noble Virtues overall, in an attempt to get things together a little more in my life and to correct the course that I have been on I am going to start writing blog posts focusing on each of the virtues. These will likely be shorter than older posts, and are more than anything a meditation on what each of these virtues mean to me.

Before I get into the first one which will be self reliance I would like to say that I have been away a long time from writing(13 months), and I can make all the excuses in the world but it comes down to one simple fact. I allowed myself to become overwhelmed by the world around me. With each additional thing that came onto my plate I let go of the very things that kept me stable. Time to take back my life, time to get back on the path, time to live Tru.

Today I am focusing on Self Reliance:

The ability to survive without anyone else is the truest expression of freedom. Self reliance is important because it means that you’ve achieved the success that will allow you to genuinely improve yourself, and to help others. It is a hierarchy of needs: if you are struggling to get the basics, you can never reach greatness. Worse still, if you are begging just to get through, you haven’t reached the point where you can improve on the parts of your character that need work.

At first look, this is a selfish virtue: “I am self reliant, I need no one, BLARGH!” The reality of it is, self-reliance is also the first step towards hospitality. Once you have provided for yourself, you can begin to help others grow and provide for themselves. It’s like your friendly flight attendant says: “If you are travelling with a child or someone who requires assistance, secure your mask first, and then assist the other person.” You can’t help anyone if you’re gasping for air.

This is what I wrote in the original post on self reliance, and it touches on the important parts of this virtue for me. Without self reliance you aren’t free to be yourself, and worse you don’t have the ability to care for others. This latter is part of the reason I am starting with this virtue, I have lost the ability to care for others through losing the ability to care for myself. The basics of how I lost my way was I listened to what others thought my path should be, I made compromises in my life thinking that it would be better for my family. This was my biggest mistake, I was trying so hard to take care of my Lady and children that I put aside myself which meant that I had no way to actually complete the goals ahead of me. My Lady is full of wisdom and one of her most brilliant chastisements/encouragements is to look me in the eyes and say “You are so busy trying to take care of me that you are failing to take care of me”. I was so busy trying to be what I thought was needed, so busy putting effort into a path that wasn’t mine that I couldn’t actually give my family the things that they had come to expect from me.

Now the time has come to change that and find my way once more. I have charted a new course, and over the next couple of months I will be sharing it with you. It starts with self reliance, by caring for myself and getting en route I will have the ability to care for my family, my pack, and my clan.

Goals

• Increase self reliance, by using organizational system that will help me remember the things I need to do.
• Work hard on the path I need to take to get my career in motion.
• Stop relying on others to make things right.